How to Encourage Siblings to Celebrate Each Other's Successes

29 August 2025

It’s no secret that sibling relationships can be a complicated mix of love, rivalry, and instinctive competition. One minute they’re best friends building pillow forts, the next they’re arguing over who got the bigger ice cream scoop. As parents, we often find ourselves playing referee instead of just enjoying the chaos. But what if we could flip the script? What if we could teach our kids not just to coexist, but to genuinely celebrate each other's wins?

Let’s dive into how to encourage siblings to cheer each other on, from the little daily wins to the big achievements—without eye rolls or muttered “whatever” under their breath.

Why Celebrating Sibling Successes Matters

Before we jump into the practical stuff, let’s talk about the “why.” Encouraging siblings to acknowledge and celebrate each other promotes more than just good manners. It builds empathy, strengthens family bonds, reduces jealousy, and boosts self-esteem on both ends.

When kids learn to root for one another, they’re developing emotional maturity and the kind of support system that lasts well beyond childhood. After all, isn’t that what we ultimately want? A lifelong relationship between siblings that’s based on mutual respect and genuine care.

Start with Your Example: Kids Mirror What They See

Here’s the truth bomb—your kids are watching you. They see how you respond to Dad getting a promotion, or how you react when your friend posts a vacation pic in the Bahamas. Are you genuinely happy for others, or do you unintentionally downplay their success?

Take every opportunity to model celebration. Say things like:

- “Wow! That’s amazing—how hard did you work for that?”
- “Let’s do something special for your sister to show her we’re proud.”

When you consistently show what it looks like to be happy for someone else’s win, your children are learning the same.

Spotlight the Effort, Not Just the Outcome

Kids are naturally competitive, especially when there’s only one slice of cake left on the table. If one child wins a medal or aces a test, the others might feel overshadowed. That's why it’s so important to highlight the effort behind the success, not just the end result.

Instead of saying “Look at your brother’s trophy!”, try:

- “He practiced every day after school—aren’t you proud of how hard he worked?”

This shifts the focus away from competition and toward appreciating persistence, which is something everyone can relate to and support.

Turn Jealousy into Curiosity

It’s perfectly normal for kids to feel jealous of their siblings from time to time. Heck, adults feel it too. But instead of shaming those feelings (or pretending they don’t exist), help your kids explore them.

Ask questions like:

- “What makes you feel upset about your sister’s win?”
- “Is there something you'd like help with so you can reach your goals too?”

When you approach jealousy with curiosity instead of criticism, you give your child the tools to process it in a healthy way—and eventually, replace it with pride for their sibling.

Create Traditions Around Celebrating Wins

Celebrations don’t have to be a big deal with balloons and confetti (although who doesn’t love confetti?). They can be as simple as letting your child pick what’s for dinner, or a family “shout-out” session where everyone shares something they’re proud of someone else for that week.

Some fun traditions might include:

- A “Family High-Five” jar: Each time someone achieves something, siblings write a note about it and drop it in.
- A rotating award (like a silly crown or badge) for the “Encourager of the Week.”
- A special breakfast or dessert chosen by the sibling being celebrated, where the others help cook or set up.

Traditions like these build anticipation and make celebration an automatic, joyful part of family life.

Use Positive Language That Brings Unity

Words are powerful. They can build bridges or walls between your kids. Encourage language that lifts each other up, like:

- “I’m proud of you!”
- “You worked so hard for that!”
- “You totally deserved that moment!”

Correct (gently!) when one child makes a snide comment like, “Well, I could’ve done that too.” Help them rephrase it into something kinder or just more neutral. Over time, positivity becomes the norm, not the exception.

Don’t Force It—But Don’t Ignore It Either

Trying to make your kids be proud of each other can backfire. Nobody likes being told how to feel. Instead, gently nudge them and express your own excitement.

Let’s say your daughter wins a spelling bee and your son rolls his eyes. You could say:

> “I get that maybe you’re feeling left out, but this is a big deal for her. Why don’t we all go out for milkshakes and celebrate? You’ll get your turn too.”

This keeps things light but lets your son know that it’s okay to step aside and let someone else shine sometimes.

Help Them Set Personal Goals and Celebrate Progress

One of the main reasons jealousy creeps in is because kids feel like they’re falling behind. Help each child set their own goals that have nothing to do with their siblings. When their progress is measured against their own growth, and not someone else’s, it’s easier for them to celebrate others.

Things you can try:

- Use charts or journals to track personal wins, big or small.
- Celebrate non-academic victories: kindness, teamwork, creativity.
- Make reflection a regular thing—ask, “What are you most proud of this week?”

When each child feels seen and valued for who they are, it becomes easier to clap for someone else’s moment in the spotlight.

Teach Conflict Resolution and Emotional Vocabulary

Sometimes, negative reactions to a sibling’s success come from not knowing how to process or express emotions. Help your kids build an emotional vocabulary.

Teach words like:

- “Disappointed”
- “Frustrated”
- “Proud”
- “Inspired”

Encourage them to say, “I feel a little left out,” instead of acting out or sulking. Talk about how both things can be true: they can be sad about their own struggles and happy for their sibling at the same time. That’s a real-life superpower.

Encourage Teamwork Through Shared Goals

Want to really build unity? Find or create situations where your kids need to work together toward a common goal. Whether it’s building a LEGO village, starting a lemonade stand, or planning a surprise for a parent’s birthday—they’ll experience success together, which makes it easier to celebrate each other’s individual victories later.

Teamwork encourages collaboration over competition and helps siblings see each other as allies, not opponents.

Give Individualized Attention and Praise

Sometimes, kids act out because they’re simply craving attention. If you’re only celebrating the “standout” child, the quieter sibling might feel invisible. Avoid making comparisons and make sure each child gets some one-on-one time where they feel special.

This fills their cup and makes them less likely to envy or resent their sibling’s recognition. When kids feel secure in their own worth, they’re way more likely to be happy for someone else’s success.

Point Out “Quiet” Successes

Not all wins have to be front and center like trophies or A+ papers. Maybe your child helped their younger sibling learn how to tie their shoes or patiently took turns during a board game. These are worth celebrating too.

Highlight these moments with comments like:

- “That was really kind of you.”
- “I noticed you helped your brother without anyone asking.”

By praising behavior that supports sibling celebration, you’re reinforcing the kind of environment you want to build—one where everyone feels valued, not just the high achievers.

Normalize the Ups and Downs

Let’s face it: even the closest siblings won’t always get along. That’s okay. The goal isn’t to create a perfect, Instagram-worthy sibling relationship. It’s to teach kids how to navigate emotions, support one another, and show up—even when they don’t feel like it.

Sometimes, saying “I’m proud of you” is hard—especially if one child is having a tough week. But when they learn to push through and say it anyway, that’s when real growth happens.

Final Thoughts: It's a Long Game

Getting siblings to celebrate each other’s successes isn’t a one-time chat or a quick fix. It’s an ongoing journey that requires patience, consistency, and a whole lot of love. But trust me—it’s worth it.

Because one day, you’ll overhear your kids high-fiving each other over something small, or cheering from the sidelines at a game, or offering advice before a big test. And in that moment, it’ll hit you: they’re becoming not just family but fans of each other.

And isn’t that the dream?