February 2, 2026 - 15:12

Few moments test a parent's composure like a full-blown toddler tantrum in a public space. Parenting coach and former nanny Devon Kuntzman, drawing from extensive experience, states, "I've seen all the behaviors," and offers a four-step approach to navigate these challenging episodes calmly and effectively.
The first crucial step is to regulate your own nervous system. Taking deep breaths prevents you from mirroring your child's heightened emotional state. Next, prioritize creating a sense of safety for your child. Get down to their level, offer a gentle touch if they accept it, and use a calm tone to acknowledge their feelings with simple phrases like, "I see you're really upset."
Kuntzman emphasizes that reasoning or explaining comes later. In the peak of the tantrum, a child's brain is flooded with emotion and cannot process logic. The third step is simply to be a quiet, supportive presence, allowing the emotional wave to pass. Finally, once the child is calm, you can gently reconnect and, if appropriate, discuss the situation. This consistent, compassionate response helps children feel secure and gradually builds their own emotional regulation skills over time.
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